


heart flip flops

by headry



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Crushes, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, How Do I Tag, M/M, Misunderstandings, Romantic Friendship, WHAT IS SLEEP, attempts at humor, but doesn't want to be a heartbreaker, first fic, implied crushes, jonah beck is a heartbreaker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-11
Updated: 2019-07-11
Packaged: 2020-06-26 12:22:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19768120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/headry/pseuds/headry
Summary: girl talk with cyrus and jonah turns into boy talk.





	heart flip flops

**Author's Note:**

> yo. this takes place directly after s03e17 and the jamber breakup. it's my first fanfic but was a lot of fun to write, so thank you for reading. <3

Jonah hadn't said more than a few words, which wouldn't be so weird if Cyrus was with anyone else, but this was _Jonah Beck_. Always smiling, always laughing, always talking. Right now, though, Cyrus couldn't tell if it was his shoelaces or the cracks in the sidewalk that captivated him more. Some people are comfortable in their own silence and it didn't hang so heavy in the air, but Jonah wasn't that person and Cyrus definitely was not that person. It didn't help that he had this sickening feeling in his gut that Jonah was angry with him.

The Amber fiasco wasn't his fault. Despite never having been in his own, Cyrus understood enough about relationships to understand that communication is key and that the drama that sprouted from the lack of it with Amber and Jonah wasn't his fault. Cyrus knew that. He _hoped_ Jonah knew that. But the downcast eyes, and the heavy quiet, and the uncharacteristic frown unnerved him.

The other boy invited him on this walk, but looking back, Cyrus really didn't give him much of a choice. After profusely apologizing to Amber, he waited all of ten minutes to text Jonah.

 **cyguy** : hey :(

 **cyguy** : how'd it go? i hope i didn't ruin things forever for you guys.

 **cyguy** : i feel reeeaaaallly bad about the whole situation.

 **cyguy** : are you okay?

 **cyguy** : you're killing me. i am literally dying right now. does my life mean nothing to you?

 **cyguy** : ok maybe that was a bit selfish, but like WHAT IS HAPPENING

 **cyguy** : is it okay if i call you?

 **jbear** : dude, you're fine. meet me back at the school

Obviously, Jonah could've just continued to ignore him, though, right? Cyrus always thought he was pretty easy to ignore. Buffy ignored him after she found out that he was friends with TJ, the basketball team ignored him whenever he stuck around during practices, TJ was ignoring him now to spend time with Kira, and even his parents ignored when he begged them not to get the divorce and-

A hand tugging on his sleeves interrupted that dark train of thought. Jonah's pulling him closer. Cyrus could feel his breath catch in his chest and for a moment, his world was spinning...before he noticed the lamppost he narrowly missed.

He glanced at Jonah who's looking at him concerned. "Thanks. Where are we going?"

"I don't know." Cyrus barely heard the mumble that came out of the boy's lips. "Where do you want to go?"

"Well," Cyrus wasn't expecting that. "Usually, I like to save my existential crisis conversation for the Spoon - fun fact, that's where I came out to Buffy - but I am very aware that is NOT an option in our current situation sooooo...next best thing?"

Jonah had the decency to give him a ghost of a smile. "Next best thing."

"The park," Cyrus said. "But that place is haunted with the ghosts of unexpected betrayal and wasted shirts, so I'd really rather not."

One of Jonah's brows lifted in an inquiry. "Should I even ask?"

"Best you don't."

Jonah chuckled, dimples flashing, and muttered something about how funny he was. It was a nice sound, that laughter and that compliment, and Cyrus found a rock to focus on instead of his friend as he continued walking and now, to his great relief, talking, "So you aren't mad at me?"

"No, dude, how could I be mad at you? I'm the one that's always screwing up."

"Not always."

"When haven't _I_ been the problem?"

Cyrus thought back on Jonah's relationships. There was Amber, then Amber again, then Andi, then Andi again, then Libby, then Amber _again_. Ah ha. "Amber treated you pretty horribly the first time around," He frowns. "Why did you get back into a relationship so quickly after Amber? That experience would have put me off from dating until at least high school."

Jonah looked at him like he was dumb. "Dude, _you_ ," He pushed him lightly on the chest. " _You_ told me that I should get back together with Amber when we broke up the first time. You said that the Jonah Beck™ needed a girlfriend."

"Okay, I definitely didn't say that."

"Or something like that," Jonah pointed off to the distance, and Cyrus followed his finger, realizing that they had walked all the way to the fields behind the school. "We were right there, remember?"

Oh. Gym class. That felt like forever ago. " _That's_ what you got from that conversation? I was most certainly trying to set you up with Andi, not Amber. And I said that you should follow your heart, not that you needed a girlfriend. Wrong lesson."

"Why does everyone keep saying that?"

"Huh?"

"Nothing." Jonah's shoulders slumped, and he walked over to a tall sycamore and leaned on it, bits of sunlight breaking through the tree's leafy canopy and brightening the gloom on his face. Cyrus would have taken the photo opportunity at any other moment. Maybe once Jonah was feeling better.

For now, he focused his eyes on Jonah. He felt a pep talk stirring inside of him, but he didn't want to say anything until it was complete.

"I just hate that I keep hurting people, or getting myself hurt."

Cyrus stepped forward and settled into the tree beside him. Jonah slid down to the ground and glanced up when Cyrus doesn't follow.

"New pants. And white. Can't risk getting grass on them."

Jonah gave him a look that says 'are you serious' and made a show of rolling his eyes, but Cyrus couldn't help but notice the fond smile.

"Hey, grass stains are serious business," But he nestled into the thick roots next to Jonah. Their shoulders were touching.

"It's okay to just be single, Jonah. I never meant to suggest that you needed a girlfriend back then, and it was probably really wrong of me to try to push you into a relationship, whether it was with Andi or Amber. You have to date somebody because you want to, not because of anybody else. And besides, we are still in middle school, and there is no rush whatsoever. Romance takes a sort of emotional intelligence that a lot of kids our age lack."

"Emotional intelligence?"

"Yeah, it's like understanding the emotions that you feel and the emotions around you, and how to deal with them in a productive and beneficial way."

Jonah snorted. "I don't have any of that."

"Some people mature faster than others. You'll get there. Like I said, there is plenty of time. Most middle school relationships don't last, anyway, so it's probably best to wait until you really know what you're looking for in a relationship. And there are some people who aren't into being in relationships at all, and nothing's wrong with that too. If you do find the right person, you'll know and things won't be so difficult."

He could tell Jonah was thinking about what he said. Eventually, he heard, "You sound like you have this all figured out."

Cyrus laughed self-deprecatingly, "Trust me, I know nothing, Jonah Beck. Nothing at all." A pang of hurt settled in his throat as he laughed, and it took some effort to swallow it down.

"Really?" Jonah turned towards him, with a sly grin. "I know I'm not the most 'emotionally intelligent' or whatever, but you're starting to sound like a real love doctor."

"Jonah, STOP-"

His face must have been beet red because Jonah exploded into a burst of giggles, and he has to cover his face to keep from laughing (and dying) too.

Wiping a tear from his eye, Jonah said, "No, but seriously. We spend so much time talking about my girl drama that I never get to hear about any of your boy troubles," He leaned in and dug his fingers into Cyrus' side. "Any crushes?"

Cyrus swatted Jonah's fingers away. "Well, I really appreciate that. It'd be really nice to have a bro to talk about all my other bros with. You know, as bros do," There was hope in those earnest green eyes, and he almost felt bad for crushing it. "Too bad it will never happen."

"What! Why not?"

Truth be told, Cyrus didn't know _why_ he felt so uncomfortable talking to Jonah about his crush on TJ. At first, he thought Jonah would be weirded out by a conversation about another boy, but here he was proving Cyrus wrong yet again. Still, he couldn't bring himself to talk about that with Jonah. He could only mention it in vague strokes with Andi and Buffy, and for whatever reason, it was impossible with Jonah. Maybe it was their past drama or maybe it was because they're always talking about Jonah's problems, not his. Or maybe it was that Jonah used to be the target of Cyrus' pining and still was in some ways. But he didn't want to lie to the other boy.

"It's personal."

"Aren't we in a personal relationship?" Jonah asked.

"Ugh, weren't we supposed to be talking about you?"

"We were. Now we're talking about you. That's how conversations work, Cyguy."

"No. We are not talking about this, Mr. Beck. Sorry, not sorry."

Jonah threw his head back onto the tree trunk, shut his eyes, and groaned. "You're no fun."

"Hey now. That's uncalled for."

"It could help me. To hear how you know when you have a crush on someone."

Cyrus was skeptical. "You're telling me that Jonah Beck™, who's had three different girlfriends in the last year, doesn't know how to tell if he likes someone or not," He shakes his head. "I guess that's plausible, but what exactly do you want to know?"

"It's just - I thought I liked Amber. Kissing her was nice. She was fun to be around, but then she wasn't and it all got so confusing. Like, I like her, but I-I nev-"

"You don't like _like_ her," It was an elementary phrase but conveyed the same meaning. "She was a friend who you thought could have been something more but wasn't."

"Yes!" Cyrus always knew how to put words to the feelings his friends had, especially Jonah. "It was the same way with Libby."

"But not Andi?"

"Andi was different," Jonah admitted, his eyes flicking to another area of the field as he thought. "I think a part of me felt like I had to be in a relationship with Andi. Like if I wasn't, my world would shatter and everything would collapse." Cyrus remembered his bar mitzvah when Jonah had his first panic attack. Andi 'broke up' with him that same day. "And I would lose you."

"Me?" His heart did a little flip-flop.

"And Buffy and everything else. I think I thought Andi was my only 'in' to the Good Hair Crew," Cyrus grinned. One day, that name would catch on, even if he and Jonah were the only ones who used it. "and that I couldn't be friends with her and the rest of you guys without dating her. Does that make any sense? I do really like her. We just work better as friends."

Cyrus took a deep breath. If his friend can be open and honest about his feelings, then he should be able to meet him halfway, right? He wanted to. He needed to. "Sometimes I can tell by my heart. It's cliche, I know, but it works. My heart might skip a beat or I might even forget to breathe. And that's just the crushing stage, but things get more intense later on."

"It isn't all butterflies, though," Cyrus thought back to when he saw Jonah and Andi getting together or when he saw TJ and Kira swinging in the park. "Other times it can feel pretty terrible when you know there's no chance you'll end up with the person. Like a punch to the gut, really. You can't stop thinking about them."

"But mostly it's really good, especially when you're alone with them and you never want that moment to end, or when you just light up whenever they're around. It feels...perfect."

He turned to look at Jonah who was staring at him, eyes glossed over. Cyrus blushed. He was rambling, and Jonah lost interest. "Or something like that."

Jonah's face broke into a dreamy, little smile, showing off his deep dimples. "Cyrus, you know you're the best thing that's ever happened to me, right?"

"Weirdly sentimental, but that means a lot," Cyrus beamed. "Hug time."

He threw his arms around Jonah and pulled him into a hug. Jonah didn't return it, just buried his face into his shoulder after a moment.

Cyrus pulled away, hands still on Jonah's shoulders, and eyed him suspiciously. "A girl didn't pop into your head while I was babbling, right? Jonah, I really think you should take a brea-"

"No, don't worry. I don't plan on getting a girlfriend anytime soon, honest." He looked like he was hiding something, though.

Cyrus was doubtful but knew Jonah would tell him about this new girl when he was ready. He just hoped this relationship didn't wind up like his last. "Being single isn't so bad. You get to spend more time with your best friends. Me, obviously."

Jonah nodded and leaned on Cyrus. "Somehow, I think I'll survive."

**Author's Note:**

> how was it, guys? comment & kudos pls. 
> 
> the gym scene was a callback to season 1, episode 7. watch it for the full context.
> 
> the jyrus tag is so dead, revive it y'all


End file.
